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     [busy signaL]

[Friday, August 29, 2003]     

there is no spoon

i'm feeling weird again. like i want to jump out of reality [or back into it], reminiscent of the barenaked ladies' pinch me:

it's like a dream you try to remember but it's gone then you
try to scream but it only comes out as a yawn when you
try to see the world beyond your front door


it's as if i remember a better life from somewhere else, and compared to that memory, this world seems kinds black and white and sandpaperish. or maybe i spend too much time watching naruto and wishing i could use henge to turn into kakashi permanently. uh, never mind.

unhappiness is when i was young and we didn't give a damn
'cause we were raised to see life as fun and take it if we can


off to band practice.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Thursday, August 28, 2003]     

hold the wheel and drive

jp invited me to join a band he was putting together for the ccs frosh welcoming party. owel, his funeral. the end result is that i'm starting to really hate drive [after three hours of non-stop playing, who wouldn't?], especially since my fingers are starting to turn various shades of purple. but it's all good, i guess.

finals are over and done with, and i'm actually quite surprised that the profs went easy on us. it's not everyday that all three tests are giveaways. this too considering the fact that i was too 'busy' to study.

macromedia flash is a pain in the ass.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Monday, August 25, 2003]     

it still doesn't feel like finals week

swapping processors with my dad's pc turned out to be a big waste of time. i opened up his pc and pried apart the cpu to reveal a pentium processor. as in pentium i. dear god. in any case i pieced my own pc back together again [but decided to leave it permanently open, for ventilation purposes] and some hours later i was good to go... except for the fact that it wouldn't start. after more tinkering, it turned out that i had the wires for start, reset, and pc speaker crossed. at least my pc didn't suffer permanent damage.

in any case i was inspired to carry out a pc spring cleaning, so i moved some files around, deleted others, and so on. i even took out my wallpaper because geric said that would speed the os up a bit. can you tell i'm desperate for an upgrade?

the compro1 finals were this morning. they were comparatively easy [which actually happens a lot when ms nats is your prof] except i had a sudden attack of the stupids and lost 10 points in one go. i hitched a ride with paco going home and hung at his house for a while. after lunch i basically had myself a naruto marathon. for those not in the know, naruto is an animé wherein the protagonist's main objective is to become a professional ninja. think flame of recca with even more humor.

i should be studying basicon right now, but that really isn't likely to happen. maybe i'll nap first and scan through my notes later tonight [or tomorrow morning]. wait. i just realized: i don't have any notes.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Saturday, August 23, 2003]     

short-term memory loss

i know that i had a lot to blog about but i can't seem to remember anything at this point in time, so i'll just type whatever i can remember.

we had a lacorp semi-reunion in town the other day: me, kris, saul, joe, mikey, mon, bau, and jonat. well not at the same time. it was more like the basic four [from me to joe] would run into other people in sets of two or three.

for a limited time only, my blog can also be found here, as part of that website i mentioned i made for basicon [the deadline of which was incidentally moved to tuesday]. i even had to buy an internet card to upload it since dlsu was hit by msblaster. at least i can use my geocities account as a cache for anything normally offline that i want to link to from here.

mon finally got a blog although i would have imagined her to be a little more chatty than a blog every other day. or maybe i'm just checking it too often.

i spent half the day chatting with fen, forwarding her songs and the like. you know, you never miss a person like you do when you know it's a fat chance of ever seeing them again. omg i'm turning into mikey. nooo!

i only have three hours til my dad comes back. that means i guess i have to start hacking his hardware. wish me luck.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Tuesday, August 19, 2003]     

mixed emotions

finally the mp is over and done with. i noticed two x's on ms nats' checklist but i used both arrays and a random number generator so i should get 10 extra points. that just leaves the basicon webpage, of which i am actually making some headway. with a little assistance from the net and microsoft frontpage, of course.

blast this cold. i think i'm allergic to my pc. dear god, no. the idea of swapping motherboards between my pc and my dad's is looking mighty tempting right now. maybe this weekend, after i'm through with all the course requirements. i just hope that i don't have another hardware adventure.

i had a weird dream yesterday morning: i was in the ccp [cultural center of the philippines] on malate business and there i saw jonat, who was sporting a mohawk. i asked him what he was doing and he said "nananaginip kasi ako na nagpagupit ako dito sa ccp," then i said "o? ako naman nananaginip na pinapunta ako dito ng malate," after which he gave me a ride home. i actually texted him when i woke up to ask if he did indeed dream of the ccp, but he replied that he had dreamt of danton remoto instead.

the worst part is that i wrote a good poem in my dream but i couldn't remember it when i woke up. i wrote a poem about the whole experience instead, a la tenacious d's tribute.

i bumped into ms franco [from zobel] yesterday on the sj walk. i somehow don't feel any motivation to poke fun at her mango-shaped [and sized] chin. most probably it's because i don't encounter her in a teacher-student environment anymore, therefore there's no more fun in trampling on her authority. or maybe i'm just losing my touch.

term ends in a week and a half but i don't feel any sense of finality. should i? i don't know, actually. they say "life is a journey so enjoy the ride," but what if you don't like the scenery? take the skyway, for example: just a long, grey, and more-or-less straight road. to the left, pollution; to the right, pollution [only this time it's makati pollution]. the only saving grace is the ama building, which looks like a giant capacitor.

another thing about college - you can't help but make referrals to your specialization, even in non-technical aspects of life. "life is like a modem..."

shet.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Saturday, August 16, 2003]     

leptospirosis

[lep•toh•spy•row•sis] n.

1. a bacterial disease caused by bacteria of the genus leptospira and usually caused by exposure to water contaminated with the urine of infected animals. symptoms include high fever, severe headache, chills, muscle aches, and vomiting, as well as jaundice, red-eye, abdominal pain, diarrhea, or a rash. if left untreated, the patient could develop kidney damage, meningitis, liver failure, and respiratory distress; in rare cases death occurs.

2. what i now have a significant chance of developing, after two days of sloshing through taft avenue floodwaters in my sandals.

but that's ok, at least i was able to attend reinkarnasyon ng salita, although i was booted off the list of readers [a relief, actually, since halfway through the program i still had no idea what i wanted to read]. the poems read were great and so were the intermission numbers [excepting a horrendous rendition of the ghost of tom jones by malate's own beef baloney].

after vernacular poetry, members of the dlsu orchestra [or whatever they call themselves] played the theme from batibot and paraiso, among others. for some reason i get sentimental whenever i hear those two pieces. donna turned out to be part of johnny panic and the bible of dreams, a band that puts music to poems [not bad at all, although their name could use some work].

i reiterate, the poems were worth the bad timing. i especially loved lourd de veyra's olpaktori, eve ensler's my vagina was my village [yes, from the vagina monologues], and the two poems of this guy who used to be from malate, whose name, sad to say, i didn't catch, and whose works, even sadder, are not available online. the titles are kwardernong rosas and something binata something something lrt, in case you have the time and the interest.

but of course the best part was the free food. for a pika-pika lover such as myself, unlimited puto't kutchinta definitely hits home. it's just too bad that they didn't have any pastillas de leche, majablanca, ube, or leche flan.

i'm going to flunk math big time. we have a quiz on wednesday and everything ms franco teaches about trigonometry goes in one ear and out the other. maybe that's because i need to understand the lesson before i can memorize it. or maybe because i was severely distracted by those two pieces of intertwined metal that you have to disentangle or you'll go crazy with obsessed compulsion.

well, i guess i better start raiding websites for ideas i can steal and put on my own. did i mention that i have to make one as a requirement for basicon? it's not that bad, really, but i prefer to leave off where networking starts creeping in.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Friday, August 15, 2003]     

two hours? 'sus, kaya 'yan!

the homework never ends! this time it's the basicon presentation on programming languages. the good news is that my mp and philhis reports are out of the way; the bad news is that i didn't sleep at all yesterday night [or morning for that matter] doing them. i conked out during math class and the next thing i know, ms franco is scolding the class "lahat na lang ng pambabastos nakuha ko sa klaseng ito! hindi pumapasok, dumadaldal imbis na makinig, natutulog!" guilty, guilty, and yes, guilty.

it suddenly rained in the afternoon. hard, i might add. kris was right - why did i wear sandals yesterday? in any case i was trudging through the brown sea, singing the refrain of rivermaya's ulan [daan-daang larawan ang / dumadaan sa 'king paningin] and the guys to my left and right started singing along. that's ok in a movie, but in real life, that's just freaky.

for some reason, ms corpuz still accepted my marcos paper, albeit with deductions. i have the feeling that even with the aforesaid deductions, it'll still get a higher grade than the succeeding cory, ramos, and erap paper [which i did yesterday morning from 6 to 7.30]. yes, i should have started earlier but i can't resist chatting or playing the guitar [many blessings on chami - may her tribe increase!].

it doesn't feel like a friday. maybe that's because at 4am, every day feels the same. or looks the same at least: stuck at my computer typing out this or that report for a subject i don't really care about except that i have to pass it to graduate.

college sucks.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Tuesday, August 12, 2003]     

the morning after

the bottom line is that chami is gone. lacorp dlsu met up for lunch today and the atmosphere was decidedly sober. except for me that is. for some reason i'm slow on the uptake when it comes to distance. maybe it's because i know for a fact that i'll still be able to communicate with her, albeit not in person. a shrink would say that i am in denial or have a skewed sense of reality. this is obviously why i don't see a shrink. why pay some guy to invent additional problems for you to worry about?

on the bright side, i got a 4.0 in the pe finals! let me gloat since it's been a long time since i was any good in sports. never mind that it was just a 50-meter breaststroke, it's still my first 4.0! remember when i said ms corpuz never mentioned that the marcos papers were due today? well she collected them anyway so i'm right now i'm researching before i start on my novena to st. jude [patron of the impossible] so that she'll still accept my paper tomorrow.

suddenly i have too many things due within the next two or three days: philhis [the aforementioned marcos paper], compro1 [the machine project, my last chance to get a 3.0 in compro1 since my third deptest doesn't look as promising anymore], basicon [a report on programming languages], and god knows what else i'll suddenly remember at the last minute. the poetry reading is on friday as well as my dalitxt entry [winners get an automatic 4.0 in filipi1]. plus, i promised jp and company that i'd breeze them through zobel security on friday too. now how exactly do i get to zobel and back before 5pm?

i came across an interesting quotation just today: "ateneans have priorites while lasallians have loyalties." that probably explains why lasallians have an overall more relaxed view on life, while ateneans are typically go-getters.

i'll stop typing now, or i might drown in ateneo-la salle reader comments. besides, i have to get back to marcos.

sige ingat.ü
 

until the day we meet again

friday sucked. i woke up late so i was therefore also late for our research paper defense. 20 minutes in fact. our defense was terrible, but we weren't as bad as yesterday's group, who were completely eaten alive. oh yeah, and we had our compro1 test from 6 to 9 as usual. that was ok except i know that i got a five-point deduction for nfd [that's 'not following directions' to the uninitiated].

saturday i went to the malate poetry workshop instead of the dlsu-admu game. a double blessing, it turns out: i got to bash other people's works [ah, sweet revenge!] and i didn't waste a hundred bucks on a losing game.

that night, we had chami's quasi-despidida at gerry's grill in town, but the after party at kris' is what really rocked. going back to chami, she's going to nyu on a scholarship [indeed, life is unfair] so we'll all miss her incredibly, especially her greener side. i got home 4am and by that time i was pretty much out of it, ranting about moonwalking and jumping houses. at least my parents understood why i was late, even if their sudden understanding was very suspicious.

yesterday, i went to see chami off at the airport and she gave me a kickass parting gift - she loaned me her guitar until she gets back. hallelujah! kince insists that that's called a pabilin but i'm a little skeptical... can anyone clarify?

anyway at the airport, there was this strange woman dancing around inside the lobby. i think she was airport staff and i felt really embarrassed for her. that is, after it stopped being funny.

speaking of funny, chami was cracking a joke before she left. she said "bakit pokpok si ms simbahan?" and then she forgot the punchline so she said "kasi mukha s'yang... um... mukha s'yang..." then kris said "paa." ok, so it's not as funny now, but if you were there, you'd have been rolling on the floor like the rest of us.

wait, i still have to do that report on marcos. or maybe i'll just do it tomorrow. ms corpuz didn't exactly say it was due today, ergo it's her own fault.

sige ingat.ü
 

[Wednesday, August 06, 2003]     

late, late, late!

i'm posting this from the linuxlab because my dlsu account is on the fritz again. it keeps telling me that i'm entering an invalid username or password. oh, maybe this has something to do with that porn site i visited last weekend!

kidding aside, this week has been really hectic for me. the basicon deptest is in 3.5 hours and i still don't know a thing. our research paper defense is on friday and we don't have any results yet. and let's not forget that reaction paper on presidents magsaysay, garcia, and macapagal due tomorrow [this doesn't seem important compared with other deadlines but my average in philhis so far is a 1.5 so i need plus points pronto!].

donna invited me to the poetry bashing, i mean, workshop this weekend, so i need to compose a new poem before tomorrow in addition to everything else. she's getting pretty suspicious about saul being conveniently busy everytime a malate function comes up. saul, if you're reading this, you better watch out - she might show up on your doorstep, screaming "wala ka pa ring images!"

and now, more everyday ilonggo with stani614
[use at your own risk]:

tsúra mo daw gin birâ ka sa bulî sang agî.
[you look like a fag attacked your ass.]
kalába sang bútu mo.
[your **** is so long.]
dakô ákon, tándoga balâ.
[mine is big, touch it.]
ásta sa salôg ang títi mo.
[your future is sagging to the floor.]

sige ingat.ü
 

[Saturday, August 02, 2003]     

nightlife kuno

my sched yesterday was total crap: classes until 1, then kince and i went back to zobel because i had to give out those stupid-ass surveys, then it was back to taft for me because we still had to go barhopping for our research paper.

the ride to zobel was somewhere between ok and fun, since kince was a good conversationalist and [unfortunately for me] an even better hangman player. kinda whiny though [i already told him that so technically it's not slander]. on some strange level he reminds me of kevin, but i can't put my finger on why exactly.

zobel was worse than i had anticipated because although my former teachers were extra nice [especially ms panaligan, but don't ask] security was a pain in the ass and the juniors-turned-seniors were an even bigger pain in the ass. oh and sir jo-on takes the cake. what a bitch.

malate was warped, to say the least. or maybe i saw it that way since i have no nightlife to speak of, but malate certainly didn't inspire me to start having one. i caught up with the malate [literary folio] people in gypsy, on nakpil, so i had donna interviewed. we later visited what lacey introduced as a 'naughty' store. how naughty? the door handles were in the shape of phalluses, how 'bout that?

of course the highlight of the evening was crepes at café breton. dracula + poseidon + la pinay = heaven [*wiggles fingers*]. i actually just got home, having spent the night at geric's, and i'm going back there in a couple of hours after i catch some z's.

robin williams' recent broadway show would probably have been more successful if he didn't say "fuck" every two seconds.

sige ingat.ü
 

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